from the archives: on fear

Idk if its Halloween season, the descent into fascism, or my pending surgery, but…. whatever the cause, fear’s been the weather lately.1

This month in Soulwork, we’ve been talking about haunting and healing. About how Black women carry both the echo of what’s been done to us and the medicine to undo it.

When I went back through the archive, (more than 50 posts now!) I saw that fear has always been part of that inheritance. The function of looking back is a survival technology. The 3 essays from the archive are a record of that education: how I learned to listen to the trembling, speak through it, and turn memory into medicine.

Below, you’ll find 3 essays from the archives and a prompt to connect each of them to our theme.

We’ve been talking about hosting workshops together. Last week I mentioned a reading salon where we dive into some of the themes in the texts I share with you all. I’ve also been thinking about hosting workshops focused on overcoming fear and building community to combat isolation.

swallowed up

i. “What are the tyrannies you swallow day by day and attempt to make your own, until you sicken and die of them still in silence” - Audre Lorde

The Soul Work NewsletterBethany Nicole

Reflection: Think of a time you swallowed your fear, pain, or truth. What monsters did that silence feed?

jumping in

I am an anxious person.

The Soul Work NewsletterBethany Nicole

Reflection: Where in your life are the ropes swinging fast? How can you learn to jump, fall, and get up again?

what would you write if you weren't afraid?

Now, you may not know what you’d write if you weren’t afraid. I seldom do. It’s a moment-to-moment struggle. But if you’re passionate to find out, then you’re ready. God help you.

The Soul Work NewsletterBethany Nicole

Reflection: What would you write or say if no one could punish you for speaking your truth?

Fear will always be present. But each time you speak, write, or leap, you teach fear (and yourself) that it doesn’t get the last word. Silence may feel safe, and hesitation may feel prudent, but the act of showing up is what transforms fear into rhythm, monsters into guides, and anxiety into movement.

You don’t have to wait. The rope is turning. The monsters are already at the edges of your vision. Speak. Write. Leap. And let fear witness your courage.

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